Snarky Behavior

Point: Yes– at some level you must remember not to distance yourself from your own capacity for empathy. Sure, “helping” the homeless doesn’t really “help” anyone do anything but score you each a temporary fix of random altruism and good-will, or food/crack/booze. Sure, you’re encouraging a culture of mendicants that inhabit the urban landscape like pigeons and rats, living off the rest of our excess, waste and refuge. And sure, some homeless will sell a sob-story of hunger, only to disdainfully dismiss your offer of a turkey sandwich from your lunch sack (this happened THREE TIMES in DC).

Still, as callous as it sounds to have to remind ourselves, these are human beings. They are people who have seen terrible tragedy in their lives, who have never had a fair opportunity, or at lease never developed the know-how to recognize or act on an opportunity when it was presented to them. As Jeff Sachs says of the draconian fiscal austerity imposed upon developing nations by the IMF: “you can’t expect someone to ‘tighten his belt’ when he can’t afford a belt in the first place.” Point being, many of these people would be on the street whether you “subsidized” their begging or not — they’d just be a lot more hungry, sober and unhappy.

Counter-point: On the other hand, no, you’re not being unreasonable to consistently say, “sorry, not today” to every person asking you to help them out. Look: homelessness is not a necessary condition of a free-market democracy (at least not to the extent in which it currently exists within America). There are governmental, religious and not-for-profit institutions and mechanisms in place to help people who are willing and able to help themselves, which, while certainly not sufficient for all, are still sufficient (and underutilized) by many.

It’s sad to admit that asking others for money requires a complete and utter lack of pride and self-esteem. It may not be the cellar of debasing activity, but it’s close to the ground floor. The lack of self-esteem stems from the self-recognition that you lack the inherent self-worth to support yourself within society. How utterly depressing!

To some degree (oh wait, let me remove my silver spoon from my mouth… there we are), the homeless must identify the Scarface cycle of self-destruction, when Pacino is all coked up and causing a scene in a club, yelling at the patrons, “You need me! You fucking need me so you can say, ‘That’s the bad guy!’” At some level, the homeless must identify their roles similarly, right? To be the visual image we all think about when we’re eating our Thanksgiving dinners.

Of course, that’s incredibly presumptous of me to assume because I come from a supportive environment and have had the necessary investments to make me a self-sufficient, contributing member of society; even if I fall off the horse, I have the tools and structure (outside of societal instituitions necessary to get back on my feet).

Answer– So, what’s the answer to this point-counterpoint?

First, at the societal level, we need to stop tolerating homelessness to the extent it currently exists. That means appropriate levels of funding at the federal, state and local levels to supplement the private and non-profit assistance already in place. We need to be less suspect of our own collective impulse to help each other and make our society great by implementing a viable safety net.

As for the answer to the intra-personal relationship at the individual level, (and this is really only a question you can answer for yourself), I would say that the best policy is “food only.” I’ve taken to carrying around snacks in my bag (a lesson my mom taught me at a young age) to give to anyone who looks particularly destitute and genuinely hungry. Sometimes, if I can engage in conversation, I even have a “buy a bum a burger” policy, in which I’ll tell them, “you know, no offense here, but you really seem too articulate to be on the street… why do you think that is?”

I like to think the self-esteem boost from a compliment framed through constructive criticism is much more fulfilling than the Big Mac.